1) Wear a shirt that says “life” and hand out lemons
2) Hire 2 private investigators and get them to follow each other
3) Run into a shop, yell “What year is this?”, when someone answers yell “IT WORKED!” and run out cheering.
4) Change name to Simon, speak in third person.
5) follow joggers around in a car blasting “Eye of The Tiger” for encouragement.